Fall soundtrack

In my current playlist:

1. The Lion Fell in Love with the Lamb (Carter Burwell)-- so what if it's from Twilight? It sounds like October sunlight.
2. River Flows Through You (Yiruma) -- sweet, delicate piano love song. I can't say no.
3. Comptine d'un autre ete l'apres midi (Yann Tiersen) -- wistful. That's the only word for this song.
4. Times Like These (Foo Fighters) -- "it's times like these we learn to love again."
5. A Caution to the Birds (The Frames) -- beautiful, yearning, a little desperate, as only Glen Hansard can be.
6. Time to Pretend (MGMT) -- along with all of the falling leaves and cool nights, there are still some rising dreams and wild parties. College has a way of making me feel completely insignificant and vulnerable one moment, and invincible the next.

It was so cool today, I had to wear a long-sleeved shirt and a sweater. I fried pork chops and ate pancakes for dinner. I love my life.

Fun fact!

I learned something new today, while reading for my African Diaspora lit class:

The word "bangarang" is not just a made-up battle cry of strangely painted Lost Boys. (If you haven't seen Hook yet, go do it now--this is a classic.) It is A Real Word--part of the Jamaican dialect, to be precise, meaning "disturbance noise" or "commotion, noise".

It's an even better battle cry now that I know what it means!

BANGARANG!

Perfect Sunday.

I woke up this morning, rolled over in the sunlight, and realized several things in rapid succession.

One: It was ten a.m.
Two: I didn't have work.
Three: I wasn't at my parents' house.
Four: I could do anything I wanted with my day.
Five: ...I was hungry.

Eleven a.m. saw me at a local bagel shop, settled into a corner seat with my laptop, bagel, and cafe con leche. Several pleasant hours passed there, and I resisted the urge to buy a second bagel; then, I went grocery shopping. An inexpensive roast and a pot of orange mums came home with me. As there were several hours of daylight left (and I was a little videogamed-out), I went running on my much-loved nearby trail.

My goal was to be home by sunset. Six miles later, I arrived just in time. Tired, hungry, happy, I tucked away some leftover beef stroganoff before doing my laundry and painting my nails. A 9:00 meeting pulled me out of the house for another hour or so, but coming back to a soft bed made the trip out almost worth it.

It's rare for me to be in Collegetown and have nothing to do on a weekend. Thus far, my Sundays have taken one of two forms: either I'm at my parents' house, and we work at the soccer fields on Sundays, or I have refereeing to do. I think I've had one free Sunday when A. was visiting, but this was the first honest-to-God, do-what-you-want-with-no-one-else-to-worry-about Sunday I've had in months.

Perfect Sunday? I think so.

I love autumn.

So...it doesn't look like this quite yet, but it's coming. There's a whisper of a chill in the air, and leaves are beginning to tumble. When the rainclouds clear away, I can tell it's getting dark earlier. It's almost that romantic, dying-off part of the year (right before winter comes, and everything is really dead), and I can't wait.

Oh, patriarchy.

It's such fun to see what a little research into the past digs up. I'm working on a media analysis paper for class Monday evening, and golly, I'd be annoyed if it weren't so much fun. Patriarchy in the media from the old days up till now yields quite a bit of interesting information, like this classic gem from Housekeeping Monthly, May 13, 1955. (which snopes rather discounts, but it's still fairly valid...)

"Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction."

In the words of Judy Brady: My God, who wouldn't want a wife?

(Happily, I've also rediscovered Anne Taintor in this hunt for 1950's advertisements, who is the perfect antidote to the perfect housewife.)

Dream job no. 500:

Writing food descriptions. Doesn't reading this just make you feel indulgent?

"The name Bogle comes from the Scots word for phantom and this, their namesake wine, disappears like one too. A blend of 54% petite sirah, 43% zinfandel and 3% mourvedre, The Phantom is a haunting, fruit forward wine that begins with traces of blueberries, violets, chocolate-covered cherries and black pepper on the nose. Subtle notes of spice, clove and mocha complement the wine's fruit characteristics on the palate, finishing with toasting oak aromas from two years in a combination of one, two and three year old American oak."

Mmm. A haunting, fruit-forward wine. How something tastes haunting is beyond me, but this one does!

Or what about this:

"A purple red colour with very seductive and attractive violet shades. The wild raspberry aroma invades the glass. In the mouth, sweet memories of sugar flakes, red fruits and violet flowers invite us to stay trapped in its magic."

My mouth is watering, and I can't stop feeling like a pretty girl in a sundress. I love the way wine people talk about wine! I'm still a very, very new student (twenty-two in two months), so I can't say much about it yet, but I can certainly listen!

V. and I wandered into a small wine-tasting at a local supermarket today, and were appropriately nonplussed by the discussion of woods and roundness and smoothness and pepper in wines. (I didn't even know they were supposed to be peppery!) We left with a little more knowledge, a few slices of truly fantastic Brie, and also a bag of Honey Nut Scooters. (I needed a little midweek grocery shopping. It was convenient. What can I say?)

So, for the past month and a half, I've been living in the most fabulous apartment right across the street from campus. I can walk to work in two minutes, jog to the gym in five, and stroll to most of my classes is less than ten. I even live right next door to a campus parking garage! Life is perfect.

Except for the fact that I've been parking outside of younger brother's dorm, a good 10--15 minute walk away. This would not be too terrible if I didn't have to do things like grocery shop midweek, or leave the house at 7:00 am to substitute teach. (That is an awfully early walk.)

Today, little brother finally got the parking office to switch us to the garage right next door: yippee! I even have a sub assignment tomorrow morning, and don't have to walk over and get the car tonight! Hurrah and hurray, lame though it is. I feel like I'm edging closer to being a grownup, somehow...not having to dodge freshmen every time I go to work must have that effect on me.

Car's back!

Quick post today, since I'm running about working on my first internship article and the first batch of papers to come due, but...my baby's back!

Z. the mechanic sent me a ride, since it started pouring just as I was due to get her. The price wasn't quite as bad as expected, though I know I'm going to turn into a tightwad for a few weeks. (Oh well. It had to be done!)

The important part of the day is: my baby's back, and no longer making funny noises!

New thing to love: Farmers' Markets.

A. and I took some time yesterday to stop by the local market, and picked up a few small necessaries while we were there.

The most necessary of the necessaries: lamb sausage.

I wish I had pictures, but the perfection of the Greek salad we made is beyond human comprehension. Warm sausage, crisp spinach, homemade croutons...*swoon*

Along with the pleasant, full feeling in my tummy is a slight ache higher on my chest: he's already headed back home for work on Monday. Cookies and tea are a poor replacement for my other half, but they'll have to do until the next visit.

"You make the rockin' world go round..."

Lots of great moments today (sitting in Barnes & Noble with A., working peacefully on paper, realizing that professor who assigned said paper is sitting three tables away), but the best came very late in it: singing "Fat Bottomed Girls" with a group of my best friends over popcorn and a Cherro-Lime slushie on a patio in the rain.

Sometimes, you gotta let it all hang out.

Good and bad.

First, the good!: I learned a bit more about cars today, and about the way mechanics' shops work. Also, I found a mechanic I like in town (as opposed to the family guy back home, who is lovely but is also two hours away.)

The bad: I had the opportunity to find the mechanic and learn about cars because my entire power steering system went out this week. Pump, pressure lines, rack--that stuff does not come cheap. Yuck.

At least A. is coming into town this weekend, and can probably be conned into driving me around (especially if a food bribe is involved). Mmm.

Dunking booths always mean fun.

Pictures will be up as soon as I find more batteries for my camera; it unfortunately died right before the Dean hit the water.

The College of Arts & Sciences had a big shindig on campus today, with booths for each department, free pizza, decent live music, and a dunking booth, complete with beloved faculty who were willing to get wet.

Everyone loves dunking booths; everyone loves a bit of sweet revenge against demanding professors; everyone feels good about donating a few canned goods (the fee for three attempts to dunk). I was feeling pretty good by the time I left...much better than I expected I'd feel after another day with no calls from the substitute office. Maybe next week!

Life is good.

Within the last year, I've taken up yoga classes at my campus rec center. I've also come to the realization that yoga is really good for me. An hour dedicated to stretching, breathing, and letting go the stress from the outside world? Yes, please. Yoga is probably one of the best things I can do for myself right now (next to getting a personal masseuse).

It goes without saying, then, that a Tuesday beginning with yoga will be a good day. And it was: cool, cloudy weather, cancelled classes, easygoing homework/work-work, fresh tortilla soup, and a turtle latte to top it all off.

That last little indulgence (I am such a sucker for sweet coffee) may cost me a few hours of sleep, as it's T-minus 35 minutes to bedtime and I'm highly caffeinated, but it's worth it. An English structure class last year taught me the joys of pairing homework with coffee, and the two are linked in my mind's pleasure centers. Isn't that a nice twist, relaxing by doing homework? I've got to do more of those mental hotwiring jobs...maybe if I link doing dishes to eating pie, somehow. Hmm. This may require more research (and lots of pie).

Whew!

Today, I took a hard-earned and well-deserved break, and I realized:

Just because I didn't go running today doesn't mean I'm a lazy bum who's going to gain fifty pounds overnight.
Just because I didn't work in the schools today doesn't mean I'm a bad worker who will be fired.
Just because I eased my way through homework today doesn't mean I'm a poor student, and it doesn't mean I will fail.

It just means I didn't go running, or working, or crazy over homework today. That's all. It's just what happened today.

For most people, this might not be much of a revelation...for me, the three-point-ridiculous college senior, stubborn athlete, and lifelong perfectionist, this is huge! A. was ecstatic earlier today when I admitted that "I just might not be that interesting right now; I'm in the dull part of the day."

"Good! That's great, hon!" he laughed back over the phone. "It's so good to hear those words from you--you can have dull days! There should be days you don't do anything interesting at all and relax."

Today was that day. I did do a teeny bit of reading for class and video editing for the internship, and attended my evening class, but other than that, I slept in, relaxed, played video games, cooked for the fun of cooking, and eased my way into the week. I feel fantastic, miles away from the very tired and very stressed place I was in just last night.

Now, if I can only hold onto that sense of relaxation--and my directions to get it--for the rest of the school year, I should be in good shape.

Good bloggers borrow; great ones steal.

Or something like that.

Wholesale larceny will be taking place very, very soon, because I am stealing this fabulous idea asap.

I might argue that this entire experiment is a sort of inspiration board of words and memories...but if my progressive teacher education has taught me anything, it's that people read many different alphabets, and only one starts with "A, B, C." A visual inspiration board might be something cool to do one of these days off, if I ever give myself one! (Tomorrow, perhaps: I'm fighting myself over accepting a sub assignment vs. resting after working hard eight days straight.)

We made it through another week!

Time to celebrate!

Friday I'm In Love

One writing lab appointment, several errands, and a few hundred words away from two days of freedom--yesss. I love Fridays.

monday you can hold your head, tuesday wednesday stay in bed, or thursday watch the walls instead...it's friday i'm in love

Taking time.

Thought for the day: Happiness will not just come to you. Sometimes, you have to look for it; sometimes, you have to create it.

After a triumphant (but exhausting) Wednesday, I took a little bit of this morning for myself. Forty minutes, a good book, a cup of coffee, a pumpkin scone, and a park bench. I can still feel the serene, quiet feeling following me around. It was the perfect forty-minute interlude, and afterwards, I walked to class smiling.

Firsts.

First of all, I would just like to say:

I can do anything.

Today was my first day substituting in a new school district, and I was called into a school I hadn't yet visited through college field placements. What's more, I wasn't called in as a regular classroom teacher--the assignment called for a paraprofessional, an assistant to the teacher and a signal of someone in the class who would need some Extra Attention.

Okay, no problem, I've worked with English language learners before, I've worked with kids who have some behavior issues before...but I have no idea how to help with a student who has a physical disability or condition. But I'm just a para. There will still be a teacher in the room. This is okay.

When I arrive, I find out that I'm working at the Boys & Girls' Town, and I'm nervous. These are twelve-year-olds who've been through more than I can imagine. My childhood was normal for a white, middle-class child--"normal" for them has been very different. I was so nervous before they came in, wondering: How will I relate to these kids? Will they care? What is the regular teacher going to expect of me? Are we going to have a good day?

We had a great day. We worked on math, science, and reading; we ate lunch together; we played Speed and chess and Egyptian Rat Race. There were a few moments of serious conflict resolution and hidden nervousness, but the class was full of wonderful characters and a fantastic teacher, too. When I go back again, I'll have a little more of the routine down, and can't wait to spend more time with the kids. (I have to polish my chess skills, too--I was very soundly beaten today!)

After my first day of school, I raced home, made dinner (first attempt at mussels!), and hurried off to my first center in college soccer. When I arrived, there was another surprise waiting: one of the leading members of my officials' association, waiting with a clipboard and a rulebook, already watching the men's game (and planning to stick around for mine). A surprise assessment, on my first game! Joy.

Two whistles into the game, I was relaxed, running with the play, and having a fantastic time. Only 90 minues and one preventative yellow card later, we were finished, and I was done for the day.

Teach, referee, cook mussels? Just to repeat: I can do anything.

Oh, school/life.

Things I like:
*Remembering a mandatory meeting several hours before the scheduled time, rather than several minutes.
*Taking myself out to dinner.
*Mussels on sale at the grocery store.
*Juicy Juice.

Things I like less:
*Sixteen hour days.
*Being torn between seeing friends and getting sleep.
*Cheese not on sale at the grocery store.
*Sore feet.

All in all, the day probably balanced out fairly well. Good night!

*snicker*

It is quite awful, horrible, silly escapist literature, and I'm not sure which I like better: chuckling over Twilight, or outright making fun of it.

Some of the best:

My Rejected Twilight Screenplay
Movies in Minutes: Twilight

Giggle.

It's September already?

When I first started blogging, I was a little worried about finding things to write about. “A new post every single day? Where am I going to find that kind of material? Won’t I just start repeating stupid things like ‘Ate a cheeseburger’ or ‘Slept lots’ or ‘Saw people I like’? Will it be boring? Can I stick with it?”

Very nearly one hundred posts later, I can definitively answer: Yes, everywhere, no, no, and emphatic YES.

Material has been shockingly easy to find—I’ve learned that amazing things happen every day, if you’re open to them. I’ve written about people I know, people I meet, beautiful or ironic or plain silly things that simply happen over the course of a day. Where I used to let them happen, then slip away, recording happy moments has compelled me to hang on to them. Even if the post doesn’t go up until noon the next day, I think about what I will write every evening before I go to bed: what good things happened to me today?

What an awesome question to ask.

I think I’m happier, more able to deal with the crappy things that happen to all, just because I’ve become more focused on the positive. Sure, it’s hard some days—and I won’t deny wigging out a few times since fall obligations have started up again—but “hard” isn’t “impossible,” and it gets easier every day.

I’m also so happy that I started this experiment when I did. Senior year of college is an important, crazy, fun, hectic time. I have a million memories already, and I want to remember as much of it as I can for as long as I can. This will help. I’ve always enjoyed having a record of where I’ve been, and I’ve already been some incredible places this year.

Here’s to continuing the experiment.

"That that pure sanguine complexion of yours may never be famisht with pot lucke."

I love a good potluck. The girls definitely took out all the stops for this one...


L.R. brought a pasta salad, the first dish she had ever made for anyone besides family--hurrah for new horizons!


My roomie B. made chocolate-covered strawberries and potato skins (the latter of which we ate immediately...thus the empty plate). Also, please note how many strawberries have already been eaten. This was a hungry crowd.


...and L. created an amazing Greek pizza, which was devoured in due time.

I made brownies, but by that time in the evening, we were all too busy eating and laughing at spoof videos online to care much about photographs. So, in summary, it was about as perfect a potluck as is possible...at least, until we have that Cupcake Swap we planned. Mmm, cupcakes. You know how I feel about cupcakes.

Lunch break!

It was an extremely busy day, so lots of great things happened, but one of my favorite moments came around midday, when I had a short break from class, meetings, training, etc.--and it didn't cost me much at all: just a box of sushi, and a spot on the grass.

I'm sure I looked a little funny just parked on the grass in the Law Quad (most people choose the main quad to hang on), but this year, I've found that I care much less about looking funny, and much more about enjoying what I do. Ten minutes to each lunch before class; I'm not going to lock myself in the windowless auditorium ten minutes early when it's so beautiful outside.

Another happy moment today: scratching off an item in my bucket list! When I said "teach a yoga class," I did NOT mean "...to two Marines in the extra martial arts room in the gym when our regular yoga teacher didn't show up and the room was locked." We all stretched, breathed, joked, and stretched some more. Even if it wasn't perfect (I definitely need to learn more about this, and soon), our morning suited us just fine.

And another: reading a friend's script at a playwriting workshop. Such fun!

And one more: keeping cool and calm, even when the stress and busy-ness threatened to overwhelm me.

What a wild (but still good) day.